SAndw!cH

1. 唔係我條底綫set得低, 而係我根本無底綫.

2. 打生打死得個桔, 舒舒服服有金執.

3. 我唔打死你我就唔叫laughing, 我叫crying.

..   琴晚同Yan打電話..吹咗好耐..

佢醒咗3條金句俾我.哈哈..

1: "原黎你咁好嘅, 你一直都掩飾得好好."

2: "真係唔講無人知, 講咗無人信."

3: "因為hurt得人多, 驚俾人hurt翻, 所以唔拍拖."

1、近年来中国最精彩的写实小说，全文八个字：此地  钱多  人傻  速来
    据说是发自杭州市宝石山下一出租房的汇款单上的简短附言，是该按摩女给家乡妹妹汇款时随手涂鸦的，令无数专业作家汗颜！
2、最短的幽默小说 《夜》
男：疼么？
女：恩！
男：算了？
女：别！
3、一次短篇小说大赛规定作品要涉及，宗教、性以及悬念。
结果得金奖的小说是这样的：上帝啊，女王怀孕了，谁干的？
4、世界最短科幻小说：最后一个地球人坐在家里，突然响起了敲门声。
5、世界最短KB小说：惊醒，身边躺着自己的尸体。
6、世界最短黑帮小说：穿上马甲，别让人认出来。
7、世界最短童话：癞蛤蟆娶到天鹅喽！
8、世界最短寓言：蚂蚁累死了，蚁后还那么胖。
9、中日短篇xx小说对比
（中国）男：疼吗？ 女：嗯 男：算了 女：别
（日本）女：哥，你比爸强多了 男：妈也这么说
10、据说这篇小说表现了女性意识觉醒：
男：请你吃饭 女：改日吧
11、反贪反腐小说
领导告诉男部下：要提前（钱）申请
领导告诉女部下：日后再说
12、爱情暴力小说：
题目《别每天纠缠着我要我负责任把孩子生下来然后结婚让你变成你老妈那样的女人》 正文：“啪。”
13、史上最强的武侠小说，涉及各大门派多年来恩怨情仇，故事曲折离奇，情节跌宕起伏，扣人心弦，全文如下：“秃驴，竟敢跟贫道抢师太！”
14、史上最强的写恋爱自由,***的小说.并勇于冲破封建宗教观念束缚.
"师太,你就从了老衲吧.",....

.. 呵呵..乜幾個鐘嘅情緣咁霧水阿..

focus your eyes on the last one... " special hints" one... 

it's chinese specfic styles for mass media!..   a vivid characterized and controlled system of media..

Confucius never went to the Olympics. In Beijing, you always go slowly but only when you have not been stopped. It's not the 3m-tall wire fences, or the security forces or the never-ending array of X-ray machines that have brought this city to a standstill.

It's the Olympic staff. The volunteers. The workers. An epidemic of niceness has broken out. Everyone stops you to say good morning. All 500,000 of them. Good morning. Thank you. Yes, I am well and planning on having a nice day.

An hour in Beijing is like being trapped in a lift for 18 hours with the morning counter crew at McDonald's. There is no escaping. Go to the toilet. There's two guys standing at the entrance. Good morning. Good morning.

Go to wash your hands and one of them leaps dramatically in front of you, arms out as if deflecting a grenade. He turns on the tap. Please, allowing me to do this for you.

Meanwhile, the other has sprinted to the hand paper dispenser. He carefully peels off a square and hands it to you to dry your hands. Both then stand back and watch with the intensity of students observing an origami master.

Then we must all say thank you. Again. And a series of goodbyes.

By now you're hungry. So you step into the food hall. Behind a 5m-long bench where the spiced cabbage and stir-fried pork sit steaming in heated trays, 35 workers stand waiting to serve you.

There are so many, they are lined up in three rows like a football team posing for the annual photograph. All say good morning. All watch as you select your meal. Suddenly you are stricken with performance anxiety.

Will they approve if I take the noodles and chicken? What about the pork cook? Will I bring shame and dishonour on his family by not sampling his dish? You take your meal and hurry off to pay, glancing back nervously to see them smiling and waving goodbye.

Your good humour starts to desert you. Swallow your last forkful and a squad of environmentally aware cleaning staff swarm around you. They guide you to the bins. Plastic cutlery into the recycling bin. Food leftovers in another.

Down at security your bag goes through the X-ray machine. After stepping through the metal detector a young man with the Official Olympic Smile Showing Six To Eight Teeth is instantly next to you with his metal wand.

He waves it around before slapping his forehead. "Aaah. Where be my manners? Thanking you to open your bag and allowing me to inspect your goods.''

He's clearly a graduate of the Crazy English school, widely popular in China where hundreds gather to recite English words at the top of their voices in the belief that yelling aids memory.

He spies a gold Chairman Mao watch you picked up at a souvenir stall. It's a five buck pile of garbage for which you should have paid 50c, but the girl was so nice you let them get away with it.

"Aaah,'' shouts security officer. "That watch is a most impressive possession. Now please go now and enjoy your day.''

And you do. Until the next one stops you. Twenty seconds later.

an english people go to china,

a chinese retailer ask him: " can you speak chinese?"

the english people answers her: "如果你說慢一點, 我可以聽得懂."

then, the retailer said again: "Can ..... you..... speak ....  chinese?"

 from sylvia_煙點名..

 我都唔知點解會玩d嘢.... 不過d問題就唔夠激啦...

A.被點到的要在自己的博客裡寫下自己的答案，然後去掉一個你最不喜歡的問題再加上一個你的問題，仍然組成20個問題，傳給其他8個人，列出8個需要回答問題的人的名字，還要通知對方"你被點名了"，被點名者不得拒絕回答問題，完成遊戲的人將會永遠得到大家的祝福。

B.這8個人要在自己的博客裡註明是從哪裡接到的，並且再傳給其他8個人，讓遊戲繼續下去，不得回傳。被點到名字的人將會得到大的祝福

1.呢生人裡面最愛的人

答：   暫時不知道..因為還有很長的人生要過...有生之年最后一天就會知道...

2.你覺得你了解自己嗎？

答：暸解

3.下一個生日，最希望得到什麼禮物？

答：家人\朋友身體健康

4.最近5個月最開心的事？

答：... 信了基督.

5.你最想去哪個地方？為什麼？

答：歐洲..   因為古典..

6.第一次發生性關繫是什麼時候?

答：....02年...暑假..

7.你相信愛情還系麵包？

答：哇...面包...

8.點你名的人的3個優點（不可刪的題）    

答：善良.. 美貌..率真..

9.什麼事情會讓你覺得很幸福？

答：..傢人平安.

10.你最想回何时重新開始？

答：..高1

11.伱對好朋友嘅定义？

答：不說話的時候也不覺得尷尬..

12.對你的近況滿意嗎？有什麼需要改變？

答：蠻滿意的....   想更多的情況可以in control.

13.目前最大的娛樂活動

答：...娛樂活動??..  什麼意思...  最近都沒有...因為要考試了..

14.你最討厭的一件事是什麼？

答：...失禮的事..

15.第一眼你會看异性哪里？

答：手指..鞋..

16.如果有可能令你有一個後悔的機會，你最想做的是什麼？

答：小時候.沒有很認真學樂器..

17.此時此刻的一個小願望?

答：,..put more things under control

18.難過的時候，你是如何發洩如何轉移？

答：..煩惱... 祈禱...

19.最渴望的事?

答：世界和平

20.你比较中意大男人(女人),定係小男人(女人)..点解?

答：大女人...準確是聰明的女生...因為可以交流....

.. 熟悉我的朋友..應該知道我改了哪一條問題..

點名

.. yen903...+0... lushasha...carmen...mango.. vivian..trista..booo(thearsa..)

     突然想起有一個朋友,  他之前跟我說, 他讀過的小學, 初中, 高中, 都在他畢業之后立即倒閉...

       他就笑說,  他是一個倒霉到可以讀到學校倒閉的人....

             其實, 突然想想,  反過來地想,  他可能是一個幸運的人. 因為每個階段他都可以順利畢業, 而不是

      在讀的時候學校就倒閉了.. 

          ...   要用不同角度看現象..哈...  different attitudes lead to different results...

究竟誰是江湖人稱通殺杰?

 哈哈.